Safekeeping

By Diana Vidals

A soda tab. Some call it trash, I call it the memory of the first time a boy bought a drink for me. Holding it rushed the excitement back to me, the sounds of glasses clinking and the sight of good company. It is a moment I want to live in forever, so I grab the little silver tab off the table and slip it into my pocket for a rainy day.

Throughout the years I have curated the most complex stash of photos, receipts, ticket stubs, rocks, and soda tabs tucked away in shoe boxes. Though the idea of a memory box is nothing new, as proven by the “She probably threw it away” trend.

My collection began in 2019 with homework from my therapist. The homework: collecting keepsakes and mementos of achievements and happy memories to look back on. This attempt to readjust my view on life was initially met with scoffs until I gave in, tossing an “I heart the Beatles” sticker given to me by a friend into a shoe box under my bed.

It wasn’t long before I began tossing more and more in and becoming enveloped in the idea of a memory box to archive these little moments. It wasn’t long before one box became two and then three. With each new addition, I dig deep into my past entries, revisiting old memories and versions of myself, an angsty freshman in high school, an overly ambitious senior, and a college junior.

Now five years later, I have become a hoarder of memories, saving insignificant trinkets to remember big moments.

Initially, this project was meant to reflect good moments, medals, birthday cards, and awards but around sixteen, I realized that saving just the happy moments was inauthentic to the story I would one day look back on and possibly share with others. With this thought in mind, I saved more than just pleasant memories, polaroids with estranged friends, unsent love letters, and sad diary entries.

While some might find moments like this too tough to revisit, I look for the beauty in the new things my past self was unaware would come, new friends, new crushes, and better moments.

Eventually, even these moments will be drowned out by the new experiences to come. For now, they rest under my bed for safekeeping waiting for a rainy day.